Posted by: hockeygrl1 | March 15, 2011


“Five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes

How do you measure a year in the life?”

I was at my daughters band concert. They played a medley of songs from Rent, my second favorite musical. I’ve always loved this song, but today it really hit me… “How do you measure a year in the life?”

For me its been doctors, prescriptions, treatments, and disappointment. It’s not how anyone would want to spend a year and only other people who battle against an illness can understand. You get your hopes up with each new medication, hoping it will be the one to make you fell better and for me each one has been a let down.

“How do you measure – measure a year?

In daylight – in sunsets

In midnights – In cups of coffee

In inches -In Miles

In Laughter- In Strife”

I’d like to measure this year in happier times. It will be through my kids as I don’t have the energy to do much.

In band concerts – In proms

In dance competitions – In 1st dates

In good grades – In silly sleep overs

In movie nights – In love

There is a lot of love between me and my kids. You can see it in the pride they have when they talk about me. The know I’m fighting lupus with every thing I have and they’re proud of it. I can help them complete their homework (even calculus) and their proud of it. Cassie can name a song or an artist and I know the work and sometimes can play it on the piano and she’s proud of me.

It really goes both ways. I’m just as proud of them for being their own people.

Cassie has every bit of anything artistic that was in me and then some. She can draw, pant and see things through a camera lens that most would miss. She’s a graceful dancer, but not afraid to walk on the ugly side with her dead prom queen dance this year.

Brandon has all my brains with some silliness added in. His drama teacher thinks he’s a genius when it comes to comedy. It is true. He picks me up every day with a silly joke or story. I love it. Brains, he has them and the teachers know it and challenge him.

So this year in my life “how about love? Measure in love. Seasons of love.” I’ll measure the loving moments with the kids in their final years of high school. Before they have to pay rent. After all, with my illness I should be living like “no day but today.”

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