Posted by: hockeygrl1 | May 30, 2011

Sorry I’ve been gone

I know I’ve been neglecting my blog. Between end of school activities, dance recital and taking care of Bella and myself, I just haven’t had the energy to type. If you are a facebook friend or follower on Twitter, I do send updates, but they are from my phone while I sit comfortably on the couch. They are short and sweet and kind of give you a picture of what’s going on.

Bella is sleeping right now. It’s cute, she is growling in her sleep and I bet she is fighting that Bull Snake from yesterday. I didn’t let her mess with it because it has a right to live too. Today on our long, hot walk, she tried to chase some ducks. I wish I had my phone ready to record because it was so cute. She did her walk that she only does when she gets a new toy. She didn’t sneak up on them; it was more like a prance. By the time she got into the water they were flying away. Bella honestly looked sad. I some times wonder if she is trying to make friends with the animals. She is friends with the cats and kittens.

For a month now Bella and I have been religiously taking our walks. We get it in at least 5 days a week for an hour. Some weeks we do get all 7 days in, but due to weather and how I feel, we may miss a day here and there. I can’t say that it has made a difference in my weight yet. Of course I’m still on the steroids, but it’s a small dose (4mg). You’d think that I could start my weight loss already.

It really makes me cranky. I’m a skinny person trapped in this body. I’m screaming, “Let me out,” but no one can hear me. I look like I’m pregnant. Seriously! Most of my weight has grown around my middle and it’s just in time for swimsuit season. I want to cry, but it won’t fix anything so I’m venting in my blog instead.

I’m trying to embrace my new self and try to inspire good change, but some days it’s just not possible.

I’ll let you know when the numbers start to get down. Oh yea, I’ve been walking even if the level of pain I’m experiencing is high. I can’t tell you that it makes it better, but I can say that it makes me feel like I’m taking control. As a Virgo I need that!


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